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April,
2008

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5.9 Cracks
in
Joshua Tree
  Master these routes and you can travel the nation freely picking the plums in this the most classic grade.
I have lead all the routes, some with relative ease, others with hangs and the metallic taste of fear in my mouth. Not included are those rare fivetens easier than some entries here, and the fiveeights so scary I couldn't do them.
The ratings are the ones given in Alan Bartlett's series of guidebooks, which I find to be the best and most accurate source for climbing in JT.
The list is graded with the most difficult last.
 

euthyphro
Feel good climb, with killer pro and great holds. Nearly all cracks in JT are a variation of this theme. Shade.
cake walk
Like above route, but better and longer. The traverse is easier for tall people, but the crux seems to be the moves right afterwards. Mostly fingers, with the occasional handjam. Sun from midday.
young lust
Short and cruxy. Not particularly classic but the rock is good. Shade.
room to shroom
Yosemite-style splitter that is only negotiable via pure jamming. From thin hands to big fists, before a cool finish on a thin dike. Run out from here, but if you got this far it shouldn't be a problem. Late PM sun.
colorado crack
The rock is gritty and a bit loose down low. It gets more solid as you move up, but remains gritty. It is still a good outing, with points for lengths and cool crux. AM sun.
looney tunes
Fingers to OW, JT style. Average climb. PM sun.
finger food
If someone held a gun to my head ordering me to solo a fivenine, this would be it. The route is short, with the main difficulties at mid heights, and it start right from the sandy desert floor. It is also a fabulous climb. AM sun.
double dip
smithereens
Harder version of Young Lust, and part of the Rock Garden Valley Ensemble. Shade.
popular mechanics
Unusual smooth, white rock on this unusual JT finger dihedral. Long walk, for JT. Early AM sun.
high strung
peabody's peril
touch 'n go

Essential JT route. Once you feel at ease on this steep, technical climb, the 5.9 grade is yours. Shade.
dummy's delight
T he key here is foresight, footwork and excess strength to exercise the first two demands. AM sun.
grounder
crack #5
nobody walks in LA

Demanding long route, that always scare me a bit. Several cruxes along the way, with the last one being the hardest, but with the best pro. Possible to avoid the easy final chimney via steep corner on left. Sun from midday.
enforcer, the
vorpal sword

As long as that protruding block in the crux stays put this is a five star route. Balance is the challenge here, plus maintaining physical reserves for the all-out finish. Early AM sun.
hot crystals
Hard, thin face climbing with difficult, but adequate pro. Very few spots to shake out on this sustained but short route. Early AM sun.
la reina
An overhanging dihedral presents you with a race against time, but like most JT routes it is not too long. The moves are strenuous and favors jamming-stemming skills. AM sun.
wild wind
Next to Sail Away, and therefore worth doing. AM sun.
progressive lizard
right lizard crack
count on your fingers
Steep face climbing around a thin crack. Shade.
north overhang
An exercise in commitment and jamming technique, this one-move-wonder gets high scores for exposure and fear factor. Late PM sun.
kaptain kronos

Loose start, which, when done clear from the desert floor, is marginally safe and real hard. Things improve shortly thereafter, featuring steep, physical jamming. Some wide sections. Sunny.
nobody's right mind
m & m's plain

Ease of access makes up for a few shortcomings, such as lengths and rock quality. Early AM sun.
yei-bei-chei crack
This one packs a fair bit of challenge into 40'. Recommended. Bring up to medium sized cams. PM sun.
pope's crack
With good crack climbing technique and a calm attitude, this otherwise awkward and pumpy route can be a joy. Up higher are a variety of obstacles. Make sure to have a few long runners. Sunny.
overseer
Loose and probably not too safe in the beginning. Bring a level head for that and strong forearms for the wild finish thru an exposed roof to fingers and no feet. Shade.
spitwad
Another brilliant route in the fun Rock Garden Valley. The final moves are balancy and memorable, featuring rounded edges. Shade.
sugar daddy

Many times in JT the cracks start out thin or non-existing, making it cruxy and unprotected to get going (other routes with this issue are kaptain kronos, overseer, finger food, hot crystals, colorado crack and others). With a flat sandy landing this is less of a problem, but here the highball injury potential is there. The real crux follows shortly thereafter, but the gear is in place by then. PM sun.
invisibility lessons
2" crack. Hard for typical male-sized mitts. This section is short (hence the fivenine rating), but shows how difficult the size can be. Shade.
prepackaged
This is what climbing is all about. Sustained, interesting, exposed, hard, good pro. No rest for the weary in the first 60 or so feet. Small nuts in the crux. Shade.
short but sweet
The beginning has questionable gear, hard moves and bad fall potential. That's a lot to risk for a super short route, but on a good day it should work out. Have someone big around to spot you. AM sun.
super roof
Strenuous.
split personality

Very intimidating lead, especially on-sight when you don't know what that distant finger crack will bring in terms of pro and difficulty. The top out, after this brief crack runs out is wicked too. High quality. Shade.
sphincter quits
Very cruxy. Don't believe I've done this clean yet, but due to such unpleasant uncertainty I haven't been back in years. PM sun.
flawless fissure
Hard route, featuring steepness, wideness and weirdness. PM sun.

 

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